You really make my day. Every I tune into Ancient Aliens and see your awful spray tan hair meticulously styled to look unkempt I smile. Best of all is that pre-Columbian airplane lapel pin that totally isn’t just a stylized insect. Nothing brightens my day then when I watch a new episode every week to see what new thing you’ll pull out of your ass next. Sure the others are amusing, but none compare to you.
– Your biggest (ironic) fan